Sister writes loving tribute to Sushant in new book "Pain."

Birth: Parents hoped for boy after losing first son.

Childhood: Close siblings, nicknamed Gudia & Gulshan.

Sister's first period: Sushant upset by "barrier" between them.

Wedding: Painful goodbye as sister moves to US.

Last visits: In India annually 2014-2017, couldn't reach in 2020.

News of death: Shock, but spiritual practice offered solace.

No closure: Couldn't see him before cremation, inspired book.

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